Q: Whats the difference between Hillary Clinton and a pit bull?A: The pit bull doesnt carry a briefcase.

Saddam Hussein calls President Clinton and tells him, "Bill, I had awonderful dream last night. I could see America, the whole beautifulcountry, and on each house I saw a banner.""What did it say on the banners?" Clinton asks.Saddam replies, "Allah is god, god is Allah."Clinton says, "You know, Saddam, I am really happy you called. Last night I had a similar dream. I could see all of Baghdad, and it was more beautiful than ever. It had been rebuilt completely, and on each house flew an enormous banner.""What could you see on the banners?" Saddam asks.Clinton replies, "I dont know. I cant read Hebrew."

Q: How does Bill Clinton say "Im about to hurt you"?A: "Trust me."

Q: How can you tell Bill Clinton from a bunch of dead bodies?A: Hes the stiff one.

Q: Why are people in Arkansas having peanut butter and jelly for Thanksgiving this year?A: Because they cant afford any more pork.

Q: How many Bill Clintons does it take to change a lightbulb?A: None--Hell only promise "change."

Q: Why are people in Arkansas having peanut butter and jelly for Thanksgiving this year?A: Theyve been having turkey for years.

Q: How can you tell when Bill Clinton is telling a lie by looking at his face?A: If his lips are moving, then hes lying.

Bill Clinton and Al Gore go into a local diner for lunch.As they read the menu the waitress comes over and askes Clinton,"Are you ready to order?"Clinton replies, "Yes, Id like a quickie.""A quickie?!?" the waitress replies. "Sir, given the currentsituation of your personal life I dont think that is a good idea.Ill come back when you are ready to order from the menu."She walks away.Gore leans over to Clinton and says, "Its pronounced Quiche."

Q: Why are people in Arkansas having peanut butter and jelly for Thanksgiving this year?A: Because theyre sending their turkey to the White House!